Children Who Have Bad Dreams or Nightmares
It all started when that mean little girl next door told your child the scary story about Bloody Mary coming out of the mirror at night .. or that kid at school who convinced your child that aliens are real .. or that commercial your child saw about a horror movie .. or your child overhearing some frightening event on the evening news ..
Your child may have seemed reassured at first by your words of comfort that these things were not real or could not hurt them, but when it was time for bed their anxieties crept back. Then, in the middle of the night they came into your room with a bad dream. The nightmare may not have even been about the thing that first scared them, but the theme was the same - someone or some thing was trying to harm them.
If the frightening image was strong enough or your child’s self-confidence was not up to the challenge, he or she may have developed an ongoing fear of having more scary dreams. Maybe they started to lay awake listening for a robber coming up the stairs or imagining scary things in the shadows of their darkened room.
This is a typical story that I have heard many times in my child psychiatry practice - a child developing a fear of a threatening person or thing, such as a robber, a kidnapper, an alien, a monster, a horror movie figure, etc. I have also heard the frustration and the fatigue in their parents who are losing sleep, losing patience and living with worry about their child who is fearful and not sleeping.
Understanding Bad Dreams, Nightmares and Night Terrors
When a person of any age falls asleep they gradually enter into a phase of Deep Sleep over the first 1-2 hours. In the deep sleep phase a person’s brain activity slows greatly and their body becomes deeply relaxed. This is followed by a phase of light sleep called REM (rapid eye movement) which is associated with normal dreaming. This is followed by 2 or 3 more deep sleep phases alternating with more REM sleep episodes. Each phase of deep sleep is progressively shorter and less deep. Most REM sleep dreaming occurs in the few hours before awakening.
Night terrors are very different from nightmares. Night terrors occur during the Deep Sleep phase, they have very little story line and are poorly recalled after awakening. A child may cry out or sit up or flail about during a night terror, but they are not even awake while the night terror is occurring. If they do awaken they are often groggy and disoriented. Night terrors typically occur within the first hour or two of falling asleep.
Nightmares are bad dreams that typically occur in the latter half of the night during REM sleep. There is usually some kind of story line with frightening images that can be easily recalled when awake. I have noticed that all dreams, good or bad, typically contain elements from the day before but they are often mixed together in new and creative ways.
What Causes Nightmares in Children?
When we go to bed for the night we stop doing the things that keep our minds busy, which frees up our minds for thinking and imagination – for better or worse. Children think about things too, but their imaginations are much stronger and more vivid than adults.
Almost all nightmares are triggered by recent events, stories, internet or TV images, or even frightening thoughts or nightmares from the day before.
Furthermore, the thing that triggered your child’s nightmares may also trigger other common fears such as:
- Fear of being alone
- Fear of the dark
- Fear of the closet or under the bed
- Fear of sounds in the house
- Fear of someone breaking in
- Fear of bad dreams or scary stories
- Fear of waking in the night
All of this results in one thing - disturbed sleep for your child and you.
Learn more about the Bedtime Hero online therapy program ..
About Dr Lauderdale
Dr. Lauderdale was in private practice as a child psychiatrist for 24 years in Victoria, BC, Canada. He has had over 35 years experience working with children and adolescents using a variety of therapeutic methods including psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, Eye Movement and Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), motivational psychology, medication and family therapy. He specializes in helping children with fears and anxiety disorders.